Most people don’t take advantage of their loft space. Either it’s left bare, for the spiders and the moths to look after, or it’s used as storage for all the things that are just waiting to be taken to the Antiques Roadshow – or to the tip.
Your loft could be so much more, though. With a little effort, and the help of LoftQuoter.co.uk, it could in fact become your very own secret Bond Baddy Laboratory. To make this happen, first of all we should examine what all those hideouts have in common.
- Secrecy. A good lab is private, so that the evil master contained within can hatch plans for world domination without pesky and irritating disturbances – particularly from that 007 chap. While laser tripwires and alarm systems are probably overkill for the average household, a concealed entrance (or at least a staircase disguised as an airing cupboard) and a bit of soundproofing (a.k.a. carpet) will go a long way towards keeping out vigilantes and Secret Service Operatives.
- Evil Furniture. What good is having a secret laboratory if you can’t casually spin your chair around and say ‘Good Evening, Mr. Bond’ when your arch-nemesis comes storming in? A large desk and a comfortable swivelling chair are musts, and how about dedicating one wall to a projection screen that can double up as a home cinema – providing an excellent cover story when the authorities come knocking.
- Escape Route. Having given away all your schemes to a hero in captivity, when the master plan is foiled, a self-respecting villain needs to be able to make a quick and effective escape without being caught by the authorities. Ideally this would take the form of a lift down to an underground garage with a getaway Aston Martin standing at the ready – but since the lift might be busy, and building regulations require an adequate fire escape route from a converted loft anyway, you might as well take the stairs.
- Gadgets. Lasers! Lights! Buttons! TV Screens! All good secret lairs have them, and failing that, a train set or Scalectrix track wouldn’t go down badly…
- Shark Tank. Actually, best not.
As you can see, planning your secret hideaway need not be torturous. You don’t have to have a Goldfinger, and there’s no reason to resort to an island resort. A loft (and a fertile imagination) is all that’s required for utter world domination.
Whether your loft conversion comes From Mother With Love or On Her Majesty’s Secret Service, it can still get you a Quantum of Solitude and A View To The Garden. Get an instant online quote, For Your Eyes Only, from LoftQuoter.co.uk – it takes less than 007 minutes, and could save you a Money Penny. After all, You Only Live Twice
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